Yes. Sometimes I don't even know what to say to God. So I just sit there in his love and absorb it. I just talked to him for a bit. I said I am so sorry for all the horrid things I have done. I've acted like a piece of garbage. When I am a precious daughter of the most awesome lover of all time. I was like "God... just hold me. I don't even have words to say. .. I don't even have rational coherent thoughts at this point.... I'm just... here. And I love you... or I'm trying to learn how to. But u are so majestic, and your love and grace are unfathomable. I am only a sinful fleshly human. And I cannot comprehend. Please just scoop me up in your arms and envelope me in your love. Please god just..... BE With me. I'm sorry for my failures, and I am sorry that in some unimaginable way.... your absolute total complete magnificentness is just... there. And my small mind can't understand or see it all. And I just... fail to be as motivated and inspired as I should be in my circumstances in life. Lord I beg you for enlightenment. We beg you for clarity and motivation. And wisdom father because YOU KNOW how desperately we seriously need that from you. Abba, father, .... please just hold my hand and stroke my hair and forgivingly, .. mercifully... please I beg you to just cover me in love and wrap me in yourself while I sleep and prepare to try again tomorrow.
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